Monday, July 1

My Life is NOT Only About Me

I'm ready to wrap up the lessons that I've learned through adultery. This will make lesson #5, but I'm sure you know that these are only the BIG lessons. There are new things I'm learning every day, and I know that we are NOT through learning. But, as I've reflected on the past couple of years, I've found that 5 major lessons stick out and will certainly stay with me for the rest of my life.

Just in case you've missed some, here's the first four lessons....
God's character can be trusted.
Operating with a victim mentality does not demonstrate trust in God's character.
True, abundant life takes work.
No matter the outcome, God is ENOUGH.

And, the fifth lesson that I've learned is that it's NOT about ME.

Here's what I mean. I believe God intended for our lives to matter... to make a difference. I believe we are called to live lives that have ETERNAL value. And, if that's the case, we must take what we've learned about the Lord through own circumstances and pass them on to others. And, we have to be intentional about this.

With this mindset, my life isn't only about ME. Notice that I said not only about me. I'm not saying that I don't matter, that YOU don't matter. Each one of us is very important to God. Psalm 139 is just one Biblical example of how delicately & intricately we were created by a God that loves each of His children very much. But, we weren't intended to live inwardly. We weren't meant to make life solely about ourselves.

If I believed my life were only about me, I don't think I'd EVER be able to survive the betrayal I've experienced. I would never be able to move beyond the fact that I have been hurt, I have been lied to, I have been wronged, I have been taken advantage of... That's a LOT of I's. Focusing only on myself disables my ability to cooperate with God and be who HE wants me to be in each of life's struggles.

Thankfully, my life isn't just about me. God called me unto Himself and saved me from my sin because He loves me AND so that I can carry that gospel to others. As a believer, it is my honor & privilege to guide a fallen believer towards his true identity in Christ. Because life isn't only about me, I can find joy in my hurt, because God allows me to see how my temporary pain could lead to a spiritual change in my own family tree. God gave me a gift in allowing me to participate with Him in the gospel story, so I don't want to waste it by refusing to see beyond ME.

Now, here is why that lesson is important to my situation and all that we have learned. Certainly, I have been hurt. It wouldn't be healthy or beneficial for me to ignore that fact. My healing is a necessary piece of the puzzle, and believe me... Scotty & I are both very dedicated to as much reading, as much therapy, and as much difficult conversation as is necessary to achieve that healing. But, because God has allowed me to see that this isn't only about ME, I get to experience the joy of being THE ONE chosen to walk with Scotty on his journey of healing, restoration, and finding who he is in Christ. The sin of adultery is generational in Scotty's family. I have the opportunity to partner with Scotty in following the Lord's leading for parenting so that we can help our boys stand up under the temptation towards this sin. Restoring our marriage and establishing our family in the fear of the LORD will change our emotional & spiritual family tree. And, I get to be a part of it. What a blessing!

I want to be about HIS work. I don't want to be so caught up in how the actions of others make ME feel. I'd rather not focus on ME, fighting tooth and nail to get what I think I deserve. In a world that is completely caught up in self, I'd much rather set aside MY agenda & cooperate with the Lord in HIS. Abundant life takes work.... And, if I'm going to work hard, I want to work at things that will outlast me. I want to leave a legacy, a foundation, built on Jesus Christ for those that follow after me.

For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ.  If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, costly stones, wood, hay or straw,  their work will be shown for what it is, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will test the quality of each person’s work. 1 Corinthians 3: 11-14

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