Amazed...

It's really crazy that I'm going to attempt to blog tonight. My heart is so full, and my brain in overwhelmed. It's 10:30 p.m. on the Friday night of a long week. So, I'm giving you fair warning that much of this post may be scattered (at best) and unreadable (at worst). I can't help it. I'm amazed, and I must share it.

God is AWESOME! His work in our lives is breathtaking. And, by 'our lives', I'm not simply referring to the Roger's. He is actively working in EACH of our daily lives! How is that possible? How can He be THAT big?!?!?

I can't even begin to tell you all that has gone on over the past couple of weeks. But, God has been "showing off". I hope that doesn't sound disrespectful to anyone. No! I don't really think God "shows off". He doesn't have to. He's been being Himself! And, thankfully, I haven't missed it. I can't share all of it, because it would take several posts. And, I won't share all of it, because I don't have permission to. But, trust me, He's been working overtime.

You may be thinking that Scotty has been offered a fabulous job. You'd be incorrect. There is still no full time job, and there really isn't the certainty of a promising lead yet. However, we are totally at peace with where we are right now. And, even more amazing than that is the fact that we have all that we need and more financially. Our Provider is taking care of us. WELL!

O.K., so now you're probably assuming that we have sold our house and have direction as to where to go next. Ummm... Wrong again. While visitors have been looking at the house pretty regularly, there hasn't been the first offer made. Nothing. But, we are certain that God will sell this house IF we are supposed to leave it and move on. And, if He is not in control of that move, WE DON'T WANT TO MAKE IT!.

No. None of the things that have been at the top of my prayer list over the past couple of weeks have answers yet other than to keep following the One that knows ALL of the answers even if He's chosen not to share them with me.Yet. :). So, why is my heart so full...

Spiritually and emotionally, He has brought me to a place that I NEVER would have imagined that I could be in only 7 short months after my tragedy. HE has birthed in me a level of forgiveness that I thought I'd never see. And, He did it suddenly.

On top of that, Scotty was pursued by and granted forgiveness from another person involved in our story. The manner in which this took place was unexplainable. So much so that in the beginning stages of communication, Scotty and I felt very uncomfortable with it. I know this doesn't make sense, because I am being so vague. But, I just can't share details. This person has every right to be angry and stay angry forever. However, he understands God's will and God's sovereignty. He sees the bigger picture, and he doesn't want to miss out on the ultimate goal God has in mind for all of this.

As today has progressed, I realized that I have NO IDEA how God intends to use all of this bad for His good which, ultimately, is MY good. I really want to get out of His way. I am so amazed and overwhelmed by Him that I just keep saying, "Show me what you want me to do. I'm in!"

I think it is no coincidence that a crisis of such magnitude happened in such a small community. It wasn't by accident that a small, Baptist church was hit hard by the sin and moral failures of so many. I believe the very public nature might just be the very point. In other words, Could it be that God is about creating change in MORE than only the lives directly affected?

So, while many people who KNOW our story aren't INVOLVED in our story, I just have this feeling that it doesn't matter. He has big things in store for us, and I am looking on with great anticipation. And, if just one person could be changed, matured, renewed or rescued WITHOUT having to go through what we have gone through, I can honestly say, "It was worth it."

I'm ready to move on! It happened. It was gross! I don't ever want to go through it again. But, I want to know what's next. I desire to follow the Spirit's leading and begin using these life lessons for some good.

Now, having said that, let me QUICKLY say that I'm not in favor of sweeping HUGE matters under the rug. I would be totally disgusted with anyone who chose to cover up serious issues and move on as if NOTHING happened. It's not healthy, and I don't believe it's Biblical. That's not at all what we've done or plan to do. There are BIG issues to uncover, learn from and heal from.

So, if you still have questions, confusions, etc. about any part of the story, I'd strongly urge you to go to the Lord with these things. Allow Him to show you how to deal with them through His Word and His Spirit. Maybe there is a work that must be done ONLY between you and Him. Maybe He'd have you reach out and voice these concerns with someone else. NO! I am not asking anyone to mask their feelings. If I've learning anything, I've learned that we've got to start being real. Genuine! Authentic!

And, from there, I invite you to look, with me, in anticipation for all the He is going to do. I'm truly overwhelmed. I've said it before. But, God is at work, and I don't want to miss out on what He's doing. The Bible is very clear... God WILL accomplish His plans! I can either join Him, or I can pout in the corner and forfeit my privilege of joining the party.

The choice is easy for me, because I SURE love a good party!

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in he church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." Ephesians 3:20-21