Lesson #2....

Surprisingly, my last post was therapeutic for me. I know that many couples rebuilding after adultery find it difficult to talk about it outside of themselves, but Scotty and I have found great comfort in the exposure of our crisis. We've been supported by so many, and we have been encouraged to be able to share our experience with others. In less than 2 years, God has used our situation to help others facing similar issues. For that reason, we've determined to be transparent and to show what most may try to cover.

So, I'll go on to lesson #2 -- Operating with a victim mentality does NOT demonstrate trust in God's character.

Have you ever been confronted with people who preach a wonderful message but never seem to live out the truths of their message? Personally, I've come in contact with those people, and I've been that person.

Now, in the fallout of adultery within my marriage, I AM the victim. This is true. But, if I really believe the lesson that I shared last week.... the character of God can be trusted.... I will not live and act as a victim.

"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." 2 Corinthians 4: 7-9

Scripture is very clear... In this world, we WILL have trouble! But, God's Word says that HE has overcome the world. So, when bad things happen in my life, I have a choice in my response. I can't think of many things that could be worse in marriage than living through adultery, BUT I still have a choice in my response. Will I respond in hatred and bitterness? Will I cower in distrust and blame all future pain on what's been done TO me?

Or, will I respond in boldness? Will I face every reminder and every difficulty as one who has been hard pressed but not crushed, persecuted but not abandoned? Will I trust the character of God enough to say that IN HIS POWER, I will be the victor rather than the victim regardless of what comes my way?

I'm going to be honest with you and confess that I have not exhibited the confidence of a victor 100% of the time since August, 2011. Even though God has proven faithful to me more times than I can count, there have been days that I chose to act like a victim. And, that's disappointing to me.

But, my daily prayer is that God will constantly remind me of HIS victory, HIS power and HIS strength which is made perfect in my weakness. He CAN'T be a victim. And, I am in HIM!

I don't know what you're facing.... In every season of life and in every relationship, there are negative things that happen TO us that are out of our control. At some point, we will ALL be the victim in situations. People WILL fail us, and we WILL have troubles. You can choose to take on the mentality of a victim when those things happen. You can become bitter, resentful and distrusting of everyone. Honestly, this world wouldn't expect anything different. You'll fit right in and probably even get a lot of sympathy.

But, I've always been drawn to people who demonstrate JOY in difficulty. It has always appeared that they know something that I don't know and have experienced things that I've not experienced. Adultery in my marriage has taught me that I can know this secret too....(Col. 1:27) "Christ in you; the hope of glory." 

There's no mountain too high, no battle too tough, no marriage too damaged when I believe this promise to be true. So, I AM a victor! I refuse to ACT like a victim.